Bleed for Me
by LibraryGirl
Summary: Zell is innocent, right? He doesn't deserve what Seifer's giving, does he? Yaoiness! You have been warned!
1. Disclaimer

Title: Untitled 

Author: LibraryGirl

Rating: R

Notes: Language, Violence, Abuse, Self-mutilation, etc.

Status: incomplete

Summary: Zell, an innocent young man in love, can't help his situation. He loves his boyfriend dearly, but said boyfriend doesn't seem to return the feelings…

Disclaimer: I, in no way, shape, or form, own any FF8 characters. I do, however, own the plot. Thank you, and enjoy!


	2. one

Chapter One

As soon as Squall Leonhart stepped into the dorm, he knew something was wrong. Something was terribly wrong. Everyone used to joke that he had a sixth sense for these kinds of things, but no one knew that he really did. And his sixth sense was yelling that something was wrong. He immediately knew this was bad. He ignored his conscience, which was scolding him for barging into someone else's dorm, and focused his attention on trying to figure out what was wrong. "Zell?"

            No answer.

            He tried again, louder this time, "Zell? Are you in here?"

            Still no answer.

            Squall sighed and kicked a path through the messy living area back to the bedroom. The door was closed. Squall knocked. "Zell?"

            There was a barely coherent moan from the other side.

            "Zell, I'm coming in." Squall slowly typed the number code to open the door. Nothing had ever really scared the lion, yet he was terrified of what he might see. As the door slid open, his worst fear was revealed.

            Zell Dincht lay naked on the bed, handcuffed to the headboard posts. His eyes were closed as if her were sleeping. One side of his face was swollen and red. All across his stomach were cuts that were still seeping with blood.

            Squall took a deep breath and went to the bed, taking a seat beside the blonde.

            Zell's eyes opened wide with fear.

            Squall reached out and touched the smaller boy's tattooed cheek.

            Zell flinched.

            "I'm sorry." Squall retrieved his hand and stood, looking for the keys to the handcuffs.

            "He took 'em," Zell whispered hoarsely, watching Squall. "But he left the blade." He let his eyes fall on the sharp metal that had caused him so much pain. It was resting on the bedside stand. It was a thin blade, curved enough to pick the lock on the restraints.

            The brunette followed his gaze and picked up the weapon. He leaned over a wounded Zell and picked the handcuffs, releasing him.

            Zell blushed and pulled a wrinkled sheet over his bare body before rubbing at his sore wrists. 

            "Where'd he go?"

            Zell shrugged. "He said he was hungry."

            "I'm sorry I didn't get here sooner."

            He shrugged again. "Not your fault."

            "Do you want me to look at your wounds? Do you need a Cure spell?"

            Zell shook his head. "I'm fine."

            This was not the first time Seifer had done this to Zell. This was not the first time Squall had saved Zell. It was a normal thing. Zell and Seifer were somewhat of a couple. Zell adored Seifer more than anything, but Seifer only used Zell for his sick sex games. With Seifer, sex always involved bondage. He was always the one to dominate, and he'd give pain but never pleasure. When Seifer wanted to fuck, Seifer fucked. No questions were asked, and Zell would do anything for his boyfriend. Even if that meant being raped.

            Squall was the only one to know about it. Others heard rumors and such, but they never paid them any attention because the two blondes actually made a cute couple. No one ever heard the harsh words that were spat from Seifer's mouth because it was only behind closed doors that Zell was abused. Physically and mentally.

            Squall had tried to stop Seifer on numerous occasions, but Seifer would never listen, and Zell would end up getting beaten even worse because Seifer thought Zell had tattled. That was never the case, because Zell had never uttered a word to anyone. The only reason Squall knew was because he had walked in on the two as Seifer raped Zell. Seifer had said nothing, only made Squall not to promise to spread any more rumors. Squall, of course, had kept quiet, not wanting to get involve. However, he did end up getting involved, helping Zell each time something happened. He cared for Zell, and he wanted to make sure he was safe.

            But there was nothing Squall could do.

            Was there?

            Presently, Squall shook his head. "You are not fine, Zell. You're the worst I've ever seen you. What happened?"

            Zell wrapped his arms around his midsection and began to rock back and forth. "He was mad at me."

            "Why?"

            "Because I told him no. I stood up to him, Squall." Zell looked up, his wide blue eyes moist with tears that were threatening to fall. "I was stupid."

            "You are not stupid. He's stupid, and I'm going to beat the shit out of him."

            Zell frantically shook his head. "No, Squall! Then he'll know I told." His voice was pleading.

            Squall didn't know what to say. Zell was right; if he confronted Seifer, Zell would get a beating for it. He rubbed his forehead. "I can't let him keep doing this to you."

            "I'm fine. Nothing a Cure can't fix." Zell tried to smile, but a split lip prevented him from doing so. 

            "Where all are you hurt?"

            "Squall, I..."

            "Where all are you hurt?" Squall repeated, giving Zell a firm look. 

            Zell sighed. "My face, lip, wrists, chest, and asshole." He shivered, remembering what Seifer had told him:

            _"You've been a bad boy, Zelly. No lubricant for you."_

There was pain, so much pain. Searing, scorching his opening. Seifer had shown no mercy, thrusting into him with so much force, Zell was surprised there wasn't any blood.

            "He cut you, didn't he?" Squall asked softly.

            "Only on my chest. They're not deep though. Just enough to draw blood."

            "Can I see?"

            Zell hesitated. What if Seifer found out someone else had seen his body? Seifer had made Zell vow not to let anyone else see his body. There was a scar curved into an S on his left hip to prove that he belonged to Seifer.

            "He won't find out," Squall promised.

            Zell took in a deep breath and pulled the sheet from his body, revealing the six or seven cuts Squall had seen earlier.

            Squall leaned down and examined them closely. He was no doctor, but those looked pretty deep. "How much blood?"

            "Not that much..."

            "You need a Cura, Zell."

            "I'm fine," he insisted.

            "No, you're not. See, look at this one." Squall pointed to the deepest gash, a tender wound where blood was leaking from the skin. Before Zell could say anything more, Squall cast a Cura spell, and the wounds healed into faint scars.

            "Thanks," Zell mumbled, looking away.

            "I want you to take a hot bath and get yourself cleaned up. Get dressed and run to the cafeteria before everyone starts to wonder why you're not there for your hotdogs." Squall smiled a bit and gently touched Zell's cheek.

            This time, Zell didn't flinch.

            "I'll see you later." Squall lightly placed a kiss on Zell's forehead before getting up and leaving.


	3. two

Chapter Two

            Squall stormed into the cafeteria, his gray eyes blazing with fury. Said eyes fell on the figure he was looking for; he was sitting at a table, laughing loudly with a group of friends. The brunette walked over and stopped in front of Seifer. The table fell silent.

            Seifer looked up at Squall innocently. "Hey, Sweetheart, so nice of you to join us. Grab a chair and have a seat."

            Squall glared. "Who the fuck do you think you are?" His voice was a low rumble.

            Seifer pretended to think for a few moments. "Well, I don't "think," I _know I am Seifer Almasy. Why ever do you ask?"_

            Squall lost whatever patience he had left, and in one split second, he had Seifer up against a nearby wall. Seifer was taller than Squall, but his height didn't matter. He wanted to kick Seifer's ass, and Seifer was not intimidating, not to Squall. "You can't keep doing that to him," he growled, just inches from Seifer's face.

            "Doing what to whom?"

            He knew damn who Squall was talking about. "Stop with your fucking games, Seifer." He pushed him farther against the wall.

            By now, the whole cafeteria's attention was focused on the conflict that was Seifer and Squall. Even a carefree Zell Dincht had stopped dead in his tracks on his way to get a hotdog when he saw the current scene. He opened his mouth and closed it again, not knowing what to say. His blue eyes were wide with shock… And fear. He shook his head, not wanting to believe it was really happening. "No…"

            However, Squall could neither hear nor see Zell, and he continued to pin Seifer to the wall.

            Seifer, who had seen Zell come into the cafeteria, tore his eyes from Squall, long enough to make eye contact with Zell, and smirk. He gave his attention back to Squall. "Ya know, Squall, you shouldn't be a hero for someone who's told you not to."

            Squall narrowed his eyes, trying to figure out what Seifer meant by that. His mind replayed the instant when Seifer had looked over his shoulder, and something clicked. Squall winced and let go of Seifer. He turned around just in time to see Zell run from the cafeteria.

            Seifer clicked his tongue and brushed past Squall to sit back down at his table. "Stop trying to save everyone, Squally."

            Squall heard, but he was leaving, jogging after Zell.

*

            He wasn't in his dorm. He wasn't in Seifer's. He wasn't in the Training Center. He wasn't in the library. He wasn't in the infirmary. Squall mentally checked off all the places he had tried and remembered that there was still the quad. He was there a few moments later, but except for the Garden Festival Committee, the place was deserted. Sighing, Squall turned to leave.

            "Squall?" a shaky voice called out.

            Squall turned to the sound of the voice. No one was there.

            "I'm over here, Squall," an almost amused voice said.

            His eyes scanned the area, and they finally landed on a familiar figure, sitting curled up at the base of a tree. It was Zell, and Squall wanted to kick himself for not seeing him before. He had his legs pulled up to his chest, and his arms were wrapped around his legs. Squall went over and sat beside him. "Zell…"

            Zell turned and looked at Squall evenly. His eyes were wet; he had been crying. "You weren't supposed to do that."

            "I… had to. He can't do that to you, Zell. It's not right."

            "I trusted you," Zell went on. He turned away and rested his chin on his knee. "I mean, now it's going to be worse for me. He's going to cut deeper. He's going to fuck harder. He's going to hit more severely." Zell shook his head and closed his eyes. He didn't want to think about all that right now. "Why did you have to get involved?"

            Squall didn't know what to say. Honestly, he got involved because he cared. Squall didn't normally care about people, but now… He cared about Zell. Ever since the war with Ultimecia and all that they had been through. He had grown attached to Zell. He wanted to look out for him and make sure he was okay. Zell was his best friend. The things that Seifer was doing to him shouldn't have been happening. Squall cared, and he wanted those things to stop. He had to get involved, because if he didn't, Seifer would probably end up killing Zell. Squall couldn't let that happen. He loved Zell. And it was his job to look out for him. He didn't know why it was his job; he just accepted and went along with it.

            "Never mind," Zell said bitterly. "Just forget it. Forget about me, Squall. Stop trying to save me."

            Squall had a brief flashback of when he had heard Seifer tell him to stop trying to save everyone. He quickly shook it away. "Zell, I can't do that."

            "Things would be a lot better for me if you would just stay out of it." Zell's voice was cold and harsh, and Squall realized that he had never heard Zell sound so pleading. 

            "You need to get out of that relationship," Squall insisted. "It's not healthy.

            "Have you ever thought that I might be happy with Seifer?" Zell snapped suddenly. "Have you ever thought of that? No, you haven't. You make me out to be a damsel in distress, but I'm not. I'm happy where I am. It may not be healthy, but I'm happy. If you really care, you'd let me be happy. So just stay the fuck out of my business."

            Squall was speechless. Zell was lying; he was not happy with his current situation. How could anyone be happy living like that? Zell had to be miserable, and Squall knew he was. He couldn't hide that. Squall knew. He could see it in Zell's eyes. He wasn't happy, and if he kept taking shit from Seifer, he'd never be happy. Zell didn't deserve that kind of life. Zell deserved to be happy. He had every right to be happy. But Seifer was keeping him away from that happiness. It was a fact that angered Squall to the point where he would kill Seifer to make Zell happy. 

            The silence was raking on Zell's nerves. He shifted uneasily. "Squall, thanks for your help, but just forget it, okay?" He stood, wiping his rear. Zell looked down at Squall sadly. "Just forget it. Now, I gotta go face him before he hunts me down." He walked away.

            Squall could only stay seated, watching Zell leave. His only regret was that he couldn't do as Zell wished and "just forget it." Squall knew he couldn't do that. The ugly truth was going to haunt him until he did something about it. And he would do anything in his power to stop Seifer.


	4. three

Chapter Three

            The bell had rung for the students and instructors to go back to class, but Zell and Seifer were in Seifer's dorm. Seifer was pacing in front of Zell, who sat anxiously on the bed.

            "You told him!" Seifer yelled. He stopped pacing long enough to grab Zell's face; his green eyes raging. "You fucking told him!"

            Zell was crying. He shook his head. "No, Seifer… He… He came in here. I didn't tell him."

            "Now you're lying to me?"

            "I'm not lying, Seifer; I swear. He came in here."

            Seifer's angry eyes narrowed. "He saw you?"

            Zell nodded before thinking of the consequences.  "He just came…"

            He was cut off as Seifer hit him. "You little slut! You let him see you?"

            Zell cringed back and rubbed his check. "Seifer, I…"

            "Shut the fuck up. I don't wanna hear your shit." He took a deep breath, trying to relax. "If anyone else finds out about this, you're dead."

            "Zell believed him. He didn't want to take any chances. He sniffed and nodded, looking down to the floor.

            "I have to go have a word with Mr. Hero. You, stay here. If you're gone when I get back…" Seifer let his threat fade, letting Zell imagine the penalties. With that said, he turned and walked from the bedroom. Seifer was gone.

            Alone, Zell broke down, sobbing. He curled into a ball on the bed and cried into a nearby pillow.

*

            Squall was sitting in his office, going over a new student's transfer papers when Seifer came strutting into the room. Squall continued to look at the papers, not paying his rival any mind.

            "Hey, Sweetheart," the tall blonde greeted, taking a seat in one of Squall's chairs. "I'd like to know who gave you the right to look at my property."

            Squall looked up from his papers, staring at Seifer blankly.

            "Yeah, I'm talkin' to you. Answer me."

            "Whatever."

            Seifer's impatience grew. "Look, I just wanna know why you think you're all high and mighty just because you saved the world. You're still one of the common people, so stop trying to save everyone."

            There was silence from Squall.

            "Don't ignore me, Puberty Boy. Who gave you the right to look at Zell?"

            "He doesn't belong to you," Squall replied evenly.

            "Last time I checked, yeah, he does."

            Squall sighed and shook his head. "He's his own person."

            "You owe me an apology," he stated. When Squall still said nothing, Seifer growled and jumped from the chair to grab Squall by his jacket. He looked Squall dead in the eyes and tightened his grip. "Apologize. Zell is not yours to look at. He is mine. He belongs to me."

            "No, he doesn't."

            "Don't argue with me. He belongs to me, and you had the audacity to look at something that doesn't belong to you."

            Squall stared back at Seifer, not saying anything. He refused to play along with Seifer's mind game. He wasn't going to apologize; he had nothing to apologize for. He wasn't sorry.

            Seifer, realizing Squall wasn't going to say anything, let go. "If you ever look at my property again, I'll kill you." Seifer left.


	5. four

Chapter Four

            The next day, Saturday, Seifer allowed Zell to take a trip to Balamb to visit his mother. There were fresh cuts criss-crossing along his stomach. He was badly bruised. The cool weather gave him an excuse for the long-sleeved shirt. 

            He was in a fairly good mood, despite his current situation. He felt as if he had nothing to worry about. He knew things could have been worse, so he thanked Hyne that Seifer hadn't killed him. 

            Zell had learned to be thankful for the little things. He had learned to see the good in the bad. He guessed that's why he was still alive; because he was still holding on to hope. He was still holding on to the fact that Seifer loved him. Zell knew he did. Seifer was nice to him when no one was watching. Seifer cared about Zell. He always made sure Zell's wounds were taken care of, so they couldn't get infected. Seifer cared, and Zell hated Squall for not seeing in. No, Zell didn't hate Squall. Squall was only trying to help. He needed to mind his own business. Squall's snooping around was hurting Zell more than it was helping him. He had tried to tell Squall he was happy with Seifer; Squall hadn't believed it. Zell hadn't believed it either, because he knew it was a lie. He wasn't happy with Seifer, but he couldn't leave. Seifer needed him. Seifer needed someone to love him. He needed someone to love. And Zell was that someone.

            When Zell arrived at Balamb, he waved at a friend of the family and walked down the narrow streets to his Ma's house. He knocked on the door and waited for his Ma to answer.

            There was a brief wait, and then Ma Dincht's chubby face greeted a smiling Zell. "Zell! Sweetie!" She gave him a tight hug and pulled him inside, closing the door. "You don't have to knock; this is your home too."

            He smiled and kissed her cheek. "I don't wanna be rude."

            "You're never rude, Zell. Come in! I've got lunch cooking." She left for the kitchen, leaving Zell in the living room.

            He felt uncomfortable, thought it was his home. He had only visited a few days before, but it felt like it had been years.

            "Is everything all right?" she called from the kitchen, where she was stirring a pot of soup on the stove.

            He nodded absently, thought it he knew she couldn't see him. "Everything's fine, Ma. Just wanted to visit."

            "That's awfully nice of you, Sweetie."

            He nodded again. "How is everyone?"

            "We're all doing fine. How are you? Are they feeding you right?"

            He laughed. "Living on hotdogs."

            He could imagine her frown. "You can't live on hotdogs, Zell."

            "I've made it this far." He walked further in and sat on the sofa. He never knew how much he missed home and his Ma until he made little visits like this. He missed waking up to the smell of her pancakes. He missed the long hot showers he got to take without having to worry about having other guys in with him. He missed not having to worry about Seifer…

            Zell had been 13 when Seifer had claimed him. He had been training in the Training Center when Seifer had come up to him and asked him to spar. Zell had seen Hyperion and quickly shook his head. He explained his skills, but Seifer insisted that he needed to work on his hand-to-hand combat.

            Reluctantly, Zell sparred with Seifer. It had ended with Zell on the ground and Seifer sitting on his waist. It had been uncomfortable for Zell, with Seifer's larger body. Yet he endured it while Seifer enjoyed his newfound power. It was then that Zell learned of Seifer's obsession with domination.

            "You like to be on bottom?" Seifer had asked teasingly.

            Zell shrugged. He didn't know this guy, and he wasn't about to go along with his perverted games. "Get off."

            Seifer grinned. He leaned down so that his face was just inches from Zell's. "I will if you will." His warm breath poured over the smaller boy's face, causing Zell to shiver.          Zell couldn't help his body's reaction to the flirting, but Seifer took advantage of it. "Someone's a little excited."

            Zell blushed and tried to squirm away from Seifer. He was thankful it was past curfew, and there weren't any other student training. He would have been thoroughly embarrassed, had someone been there.

            Seifer smirked and climbed off before stooping to help Zell stand. "Come with me."

            Zell was then led to the showers, where Seifer practically forced Zell to have sex.

            Zell now belonged to Seifer.

            Zell blinked and shook his head. A hot drop of salty water trailed down his cheek. Frustrated, he brushed it away and wiped the damp finger on his jeans. "Hey, Ma, I think I'm gonna go."

            His mother turned and looked at him as he stood. "You're not going to stay for lunch?" She definitely sounded disappointed.

            "Nah. I need to be headin' back. I'm sorry." He went and gave her a hug. 

            She peered at him closely. "Are you all right?"

            He faked a smile and nodded. "I'm perfect, Ma. Don't worry about me."

            "All right. I'll let ya go. Come back anytime." She walked him to the door and watched as he walked down the street, leaving Balamb.

*

            Since it was a Saturday, most of Balamb's students had left campus to get away for the weekend. Squall was one of the few people that actually stayed. He sat in his office, this time going over papers that involved Garden's financial issues. He was calculating numbers when his secretary buzzed in and said that there was someone to see him. Squall sighed. He honestly didn't want to be bothered; yet he knew it would be rude to ignore whoever it was. "Send them in."

            A moment later, Zell was in Squall's office. He took a seat in one of the chairs. He was quiet, waiting for to see if Squall would say anything. When Squall said nothing, Zell spoke, "I wanted to apologize for yesterday."

            _Why? You have nothing to be sorry about._

"Squall, I'm thankful that you're trying to help, but you're not really helping." 

            "I'm sorry."

            "You have nothing to be sorry for! I just… I just want you to stop. You don't have to help me; it's not safe for you either."

            "I want you to be safe, Zell. And being with Seifer is not safe." Squall put his pen down and rubbed the scar between his eyes. He wanted Zell to be healthy. The abuse he was getting could not be considered healthy. It was probably going to end up killing him.

            "Thanks for your concern," he said with a small smile. "But…"

            "What did he do to you?"

            "What?"

            "What did he do to you?"

            "Squall, I…"

            "What did he do to you?"

            Zell sighed and looked down at his hands in his lap. "Cut me. Hit me."

            "Rape you?"

            A shake of his head. "Wasn't in the mood; he was fuckin' pissed 'cause you saw me." Zell looked up, meeting Squall's gaze.

            "Anything else?"

            "He hasn't let me eat in a few days…" Zell began to rock back and forth in his seat. "He controls my eating habits, Squall. That's not normal."

            "Why don't you leave him?"

            "He loves me."

            _No, he doesn't,_ Squall wanted to say, but he didn't have the heart to destroy Zell's last hope.

            "I know what you're thinking." Zell chuckled coldly. "_He doesn't love you._" I know him, Squall, he loves me."

            _If you want to think that, go ahead, but it's not true._

"Didn't Rinoa tell you to voice your feelings?" Zell inquired, seeing Squall's thoughts in his eyes.

            Squall nodded. "No one ever said I listened." The two actually laughed at that, and for a moment, they each forgot that one day, Zell might die by Seifer's hand.


End file.
